괴뢰 홍동지

찜질방이야말로 유일한 해방공간 아닐 것인가 한다 대한민국에서는

마주치는 것마다가 충격이다 한 가족이 파탄냈다 혼자서는 주문진이 참 좋다가 한 식구가 파탄냈다 별유천지 비인간이 갑자기는 환멸로나 바뀌었다 서양 고전 음악을랑 듣는데도 그것이 꼭 잠자는 것 그것으로 보였는가 파탄냈다 그로부터 마주치는 것마다가 평범으로 바뀌었다

이사 굿 중.

요사이 마늘을 많이 먹어서냐 아침 산책하다가 또 화를 내고 말았다 네거리 녀학생들 짧은 치마 교복이 쓸데없이 시각을 자극해서다 자기들이 창녀라는 것인지 이것들이 교복 치마를 올려 입는 것인지 그게 빤쓰냐 치마냐 소리쳤다 모교 후배들한테

사진기를 들이대며 신고한다고 찍었다가는 벌금 쉽게 나올 것이다 성폭행범죄자가 되는 것이다 가해자가 순전히 피해자가 되는 이남인 것이다

이 분이 많이 늙어가는 모양인가 적응이 안 돼

죽이기 - 남성성
가두기 - 녀성성

여의치 않을 때는
스스로를 스스로 죽임(가둠)

인류 생존 원리!

썩고 싹이 나오는 마늘 한 접을 까고 찧으니 신이 난다 

티브이도 맨 그 타령이다 쫓고 쫓기는 력사history

사냥(죽이기)이냐 가두기냐

아무튼 만들지 않으면 인간이 아니다 인간이 싫으면 가만히 있기다

폭력이 없어지나 인간이 멸종됨을 기다려


(밥상을 보라 티브이를 보라 맨 잡아먹기)

내 아기는 리모콘임 자그마한 추위에도 감기가서 이불 안에 항상 같이

심심하다면 필시 잡아먹는 일 달래 캐 김치

역시 막걸리를 이 축제인생*이 먹어놓으니까 `아이디어'가 나오네 에로틱 패밀리 - 성스러운 - 씹스러운 식구
료양병원 어머니는 거기서 어느 늙은 남자 만나시길, 마찬가지로 정신병원 누나는 거기서 어느, 마찬가지로 정신이라는 것이 온전치 않은 이와

이미 많이 자주 뭔가 오고 가리다 마찬가지로 저도


* 축제인생 :  이것은 원래 희곡작가 리윤택 것이었다. 인생은 축제다, 이거다.

The Naked Rambler: the man prepared to go to prison for nudity


Six years ago, Naked Rambler Stephen Gough's hike from Land's End to John O'Groats brought him media fame – and a prison sentence. Then another, and another, and… Why has he been locked up ever since?

Neil Forsyth

guardian.co.uk, Friday 23 March 2012 22.59 GMT

 

 
Stephen Gough in HMP Perth: 'People often have to go to prison for many years before others see the light.' Photograph: Murdo MacLeod for the Guardian

Winter at HMP Perth. The river Tay carries slivers of ice on its journey past the prison wall. Prisoners' breath catches in clouds while they glumly circuit the courtyard. At this time of year, many choose not to take their allotted outdoor exercise. The stone corridors of A Hall sit silent; 133 men are in temporary lockdown while one of them is brought to meet me. To many of the prisoners this man is a stranger. They've got more chance of seeing his face in a newspaper than around the wing.

Stephen Gough occupies a parallel universe in HMP Perth. While the prison moves through its daily timetable, and other prisoners go to workshops or receive visitors, he remains alone in his cell. At 8.30pm, when the building is locked down for the night, he is released for 30 minutes. He empties his rubbish, posts his letters and has a shower. If he's lucky, he also has time for a walk, a quick circuit of the empty corridors.

This morning Gough, 52, is on his way to meet me, so the rest of A Hall wait behind their doors. He's led from his cell, along the walkway, down the stairs. I hear his bare feet padding across the stone before he turns into the office.

"Nice to meet you," Gough says politely.

We shake hands and for a moment he's unsure where to sit. With the dutifulness of a long-term prisoner, he stands awaiting instruction. His body is pale and lean, patched with strands of brown hair. His penis dangles in the cold air between us.

The media call Gough the Naked Rambler. He's serving 657 days for a breach of the peace and contempt of court. The breach was leaving HMP Perth naked after finishing a previous sentence. He was taken to Perth sheriff court, and represented himself naked. That was the contempt. When he returned to the prison, the cell was just as he'd left it – he hadn't bothered to pack.

Gough's latest conviction is his 17th in 10 years. Since May 2006 he has been in a run of short sentences broken by the same fleeting freedom: he's effectively been in custody for nearly six years for refusing to get dressed. At a recent hearing, it was suggested he could be in prison for the rest of his life. "People often have to go to prison for many years," he said, "before others see the light."

I ask how he is. "Well, you know. You adapt."

So how did an intelligent, likable, earnest man come to forfeit his liberty for his right to be naked? After a spell in the Royal Marines, and a dalliance with the Moonies in Thailand, Gough spent nearly 20 years in his native Eastleigh, Hampshire. He worked as a lorry driver and got involved with environmental groups and communal living. Then, in 2000, aged 40, he moved to Vancouver for a year with his partner and their two children.

"I wasn't working in Canada," Gough says. "I spent my time looking after the kids and going for walks. One day I was walking and something happened." He had an epiphany: "I realised I was good. Being British, buried in our upbringing is that we're not good or have to watch ourselves – maybe it comes from religion, or school. I realised that at a fundamental level I'm good, we're all good, and you can trust that one part of yourself."

This self-realisation led to Gough often choosing to be naked in public: if he was good, then his body was good. "The human body isn't offensive," he says. "If that's what we're saying, as human beings, then it's not rational."

His former partner was "more conservative" and a visit from her parents proved calamitous. "One morning I came to breakfast naked and that was it, all over," Gough says flatly. "The thing was, her parents weren't even that bothered."

The couple returned to Eastleigh together, but Gough went to live with his mother. He arrived back in England, he says, with an intense appreciation of what nakedness could offer, and questioning "things we're taught to believe are right". He visited a police station in Eastleigh and asked if it was illegal to walk naked in the streets. "They couldn't come up with an answer," he says.

His first naked walk was short-lived. In January 2003 he left his mother's home and headed for Eastleigh town centre. "Nothing really happened," he says. "There was one man who shouted, 'That's disgusting!' but he was eating a sandwich so I think that's why. I was about to go into the covered market when the police arrived in a big rush."

By his court hearing, he'd been adopted by various naturist groups. The BBC reported that he emerged naked to "a crowd of supporters". Photos show a muscular, healthy Gough beaming on the court steps. "I wanted to follow my truth," he recalls, "to keep asking questions."

That summer, Gough set off from Land's End wearing hiking boots and a rucksack. His planned destination was John O'Groats. On his first day the Cornish press ran jovial reports. On his second he was arrested in St Ives, held briefly, then released. On the town's outer fringes, he was brutally attacked: "A couple of guys pushed me over. They kicked me in the head and did this." He points to his skewed nose. "I thought, is this what it's going to be like? But actually that was the only real problem I had until I got to Scotland."

On his journey through England, skirting towns and sleeping rough, Gough was stopped "every so often" by the police. He'd put on clothes and explain what he was doing. Bemused officers, he says, would turf him out of stations "on the sly, out the back door". Someone in the legal system who does not want to be named later tells me that English police would sometimes quietly drop Gough off just over county lines.

In Scotland, however, he met more determined opposition. In the north-eastern corner he was picked up several times by police and finally convicted of breach of the peace. He served four months in HMP Inverness, an experience he found "actually quite good". It was his first taste of segregation. "I flourished and found out more about myself. You do that in extreme situations."

On his release, Gough launched a final push for John O'Groats. He was a few days from Britain's northern tip when a car stopped and a man jumped out. "He said he'd read about me and had been looking for me for days. He had a flask of soup and cake, and wished me luck." Gough reached John O'Groats on 22 January 2004 and the media were waiting. He posed for jaunty photos at the iconic signpost and local hotel staff gave him a bottle of champagne. "It was a great feeling," he says. "I thought it was the end."

Gough returned to Eastleigh, bought a van and headed for Studland, a Dorset village popular with alternative lifestyle enthusiasts. He tried to write a book about the walk, but was beset by a nagging doubt: "I kept thinking I'd been compromised. Why did I put on clothes when the police stopped me? That was wrong; it defeated the whole point."

The doubt grew until it had to be faced down. He would make the journey again, this time "without compromises". With his new girlfriend, Melanie Roberts, he set off from Land's End in June 2005.

If anything, England was even easier this time around. Photos online show Gough and Roberts naked in pubs amid grinning drinkers and shopping unclothed in supermarkets. Dealings with police were no more than an irritation. "They'd ask what we were doing, we told them and that was usually that," Gough says.

Again, it was in Scotland that he ran into trouble. "We got nabbed in Edinburgh," he says. "And I was getting a bit hardcore then."

By hardcore, Gough means he refused to get dressed for court and pleaded not guilty to breach of the peace. Roberts, on the other hand, got dressed, pleaded guilty and stayed in a hostel while Gough served two weeks in Saughton prison.

Did that cause tension between them? "People have to do what they want," Gough says. "I'm for freedom, so I accepted her decision."

They resumed their walk amid growing media interest. A documentary team caught footage of Gough and Roberts being led through a village by a piper. Yet what Gough remembers as "a carnival atmosphere" led to further problems. While many Scottish police had decided to ignore Gough in the past, his spreading fame made that more difficult. For the police, critical mass was reached when he once more entered the final stretch of his journey.

"They nabbed me again," Gough says simply. "Back in Inverness prison. Another five months."

Gough and Roberts reached John O'Groats in February 2006. Once again, he'd finished his journey in the coldest months of the year. "Pretty cold but manageable," he says defiantly, insisting temperature is an issue only "when you stop, as that's when you start seizing up. The trick is to keep going." Local journalists reported Gough and Roberts walking stoically through "lashing rain".

The two would sleep fully clothed in their sleeping bags, Roberts says. "When there's snow on the ground, it's hard to get out of your sleeping bag, let alone your clothes, to do a 22-mile walk."

They made some allowances for the weather. "We wore warm hats, thick socks, gloves and walking boots," Roberts says. "We ate lots of carbohydrates and walked fast. The closer we got to the finish, the easier it was to forget the cold and pain."

"There were fewer photographers," Gough says of his second arrival at John O'Groats. "And the champagne the hotel gave me was a miniature."

He returned to Roberts's native Bournemouth with court dates that meant he would have to go back to Scotland, and with a relationship that, away from the unique atmosphere of the walk, was no longer working. "She sensed the cause meant more to me than her," Gough says.

"It was very sad," Roberts recalls. "Steve knew he would be going to prison for a long time. We finished the relationship before he got on the plane. I worried for him, but I knew he'd suffer if he didn't follow what he feels is true and right."

On 18 May 2006, a fully-clothed Gough boarded a 6.45am flight from Southampton. After the pilot announced the descent into Edinburgh, Gough visited the toilet and emerged naked. "I knew I wanted to go to court naked and I suddenly thought, why not now? The flight attendant asked if I'd put my clothes back on. I said politely that I wouldn't and she went away. Nothing happened until we landed and the police came on."

Gough was arrested. His solicitor at the time, John Good, describes a court hearing not far short of slapstick. It emerged that after Gough returned naked from the toilet, the male passenger sitting next to him reacted by falling asleep. The arresting officer's only issue in removing Gough from the plane was the delighted reaction of a hen party. For Gough, however, his midair strip meant a four-month sentence. He has been in prison ever since.

Gough isn't mad. "They do evaluations all the time." He smiles. "I'm on top of my game mentally. I've got clarity. If I feel down, then I'm straight on the case, trying to work out why."

He emerged from more than two years of segregation with faultless psychological examinations. "If you or I spent two years in segregation," Good says, "we'd probably show signs of trauma. It just shows how focused he's become. He's immune to his surroundings."

Gough agrees: "I live at a deep level." Yet he admits to experiencing doubts about his stance. "Yeah, of course. I wake up in the morning and think, what the fuck am I doing here? But what I'm doing isn't about me. I'm challenging society and it must be challenged because it's wrong."

In Scotland, breach of the peace is partly defined as "conduct which does, or could, cause the lieges [public] to be placed in a state of fear, alarm or annoyance". The prosecution has very rarely managed to rustle up witnesses to claim Gough's nakedness has had any of these effects on them. What is keeping him in prison is simply the theoretical idea that it could.         

"I do not believe that an ordinary, reasonable person would feel any of those things if they saw me [naked] in the street," Gough says. He believes that to achieve his stated aim – to leave HMP Perth and return to Eastleigh naked – "the law doesn't have to change, just the interpretation".

Twice Scottish sheriffs found in Gough's favour that no crime had been committed, both in him being naked in public and being naked in court. "Both times the sheriffs were elderly females," notes Good, who represented Gough for more than three years (they parted company in 2010 so Gough could represent himself, making it harder for him to be excluded from the courtroom for being naked). "Stephen then chose to leave court naked and was arrested for being naked in public."

Initially, Gough was a legal novelty in Scotland and support came from surprising quarters. In 2008, Edinburgh-based solicitor Joe MacPherson prosecuted Gough, a position with which he says he was uncomfortable. "I looked at the case and thought a man walking down a public street would not cause the requisite fear and alarm to an ordinary person. It would be odd, or amusing perhaps, but nothing more. The judge said his hands were tied. Seeing a man's penis was felt to be enough to cause fear and alarm."

Eventually Gough's case was heard at Scotland's appeal court, where it was found that breach of the peace should indeed be interpreted to criminalise his behaviour. Since then Scottish sheriffs have fallen in line; his sentences have steadily increased to the maximum and, should he keep refusing to dress, he will be caught in an endless cycle of two-year sentences. He insists if he were allowed to return home naked to Eastleigh, he'd cease being naked in public "when I don't have to do it any more".

The courts, prison and police are left to attempt a solution. "Mr Gough is asked every morning if he is willing to get dressed and take part in the daily regime," a spokesman for Perth prison says. "This he refuses. Due to his refusal to wear clothes, we cannot move him around the prison, meaning all services come to him in his cell." Gough, he says, has never complained about his bedding or heating, and they work around his "unique and problematic" position.

"I put a quilt over my shoulders at night," Gough says. "That's not a contradiction because there are no restrictions on me when I'm alone in my cell. It's in public I'm restricted and go naked as a result. Even with the quilt it gets pretty cold, but exercise helps."

Chief inspector Andy McCann of Tayside police, whose officers frequently rearrest Gough in the prison car park, says, "We have had and continue to have discussions with Mr Gough to seek a compromise position. We've suggested transferring him to an English prison, or transporting him upon completion of his sentence, but these have not been acceptable arrangements to him."

Gough wants to walk out of HMP Perth and make his way home to Eastleigh naked. Anything else is dismissed as a "compromise". He's due for release in the summer. Will he again walk out naked, and into an inevitable further sentence?

"Yes, yes." He nods firmly. "That's my position."

So we're back to the beginning – a 52-year-old man threatening to sacrifice his freedom on a point of principle that, although logically coherent, is also utterly frustrating and has cost him his relationship with his two teenage children. He writes to them without reply.

"If I had a dad that was doing this, I'd probably be confused," he says. "I'm guessing as they grow up, and learn more about how life is, they'll come over to my way of thinking. I'm thinking long-term." His former partner is "angry that I'm not seeing my kids – but so am I".

He hasn't heard from Roberts for a while, though she tells me she is strongly supportive of his stance. "He's vindicating the right of the individual to be individual," she says. "For me, Steve's a hero."

The naturist groups that once gathered outside courts to cheer him are long gone. His mother is 85 "and not so well". Ten years ago, she found his nakedness amusing. "She thought of it as a funny British thing, like Monty Python playing the piano naked. Now she doesn't really get why I'm still here." He has no support, no money, just his belief.

After two hours of conversation, Gough's nakedness has faded to insignificance. He's a magnetic presence, relentless in his storytelling, the speed of his voice fluctuating as it struggles to keep up with his thoughts.

He tries to reposition the loneliness he feels, to tell himself "the connection" with others he misses can somehow be found within his own mind. Yet he admits to having an overriding wish to "have a meaningful conversation with someone. I have to catch myself," he says, "and make sure I don't become melancholy."

He writes to supporters around the world and seizes on interaction when the opportunity arises. "My threshold for small talk is higher than it would otherwise be." He laughs. "The other night I had a long conversation with a prisoner mopping the floors about my favourite type of flapjack." When he does have brief encounters with the other inmates, he says he feels "an instant camaraderie. We're all enduring privations and going through hardships together."

What he misses most about clothes are pockets ("Somewhere to put my hands"), and his nakedness forces him to see the varicose veins on his legs, "which I don't like". He prefers to position his struggle on a higher scale, but sometimes the constant need to account for his behaviour can be unbearable. Good describes occasions in court when Gough broke down entirely. "He'd be asked to explain his position and it meant so much to him to get it right that he couldn't do it. He'd choke, start sobbing."

When I ask Gough for a final summary of his standpoint, he says, "Truth and freedom are difficult concepts to understand. They can't be grasped by the mind."

When Gough poses for the photographer, he doesn't move like a naked man. He's stiff-backed and lithe, stamping his hardened feet on the ground. This is a man who has been naked for nearly six years. It's strangely difficult to imagine him clothed. The photographer asks him to place his hands on his body. Gough politely refuses, explaining that this would be just another form of covering up, of chipping at the purity of his position. Instead he stretches his arms and puffs his chest, framed against the winter's light.

Two days after my visit, I receive a long letter from Gough expanding on the reasons behind his stance. It's an extended, meandering manifesto broken by moments of sharp insight. He concludes: "We can either end up living a life that others expect of us or lives based on our own truth. The difference is the difference between living a conscious life or one that is unconscious. And that's the difference between living and not living."

기억력에 자그마한 틈새들이 생겨난다 아 이것은 그 알콜성 치매 전조 아니겠나

(<엘비라 마디간> 이것이 그렇게도 기억 안 되고 기억을 해놓았어도 다시 기억해 내기 어렵네 그래서 `앨 버려 맛이 간' 이래놓으니 조금 빨리 기억된다)(너무 많이 눕나? 그래서 똥도 가늘게 나오나?)

온통 창녀 차림으로 길을 가는 이남 젊은 녀자들을 보지 않기 위해서는 어찌하면 좋겠는가. 거리 전체 `미성년자 관람불가'.

집창촌을 형식으로 없애더니 이남 사회, 창녀촌과 같아졌다.

어떻게 해야 하나 누나를 면회하나 로모를 면회하나 수십 년 묵은 정신 질환을, 누나인데 놧두고 로모 자주 면회를 하면 되나
어떻게 하여야만 하는가

방법은, 둘 다 거부!

정 안 될 때만 가자

홀로 있어 보면 안다 중얼중얼 

따뜻하면 혼자라도 외롭지는 않다 일인 가정 많음 몸 따스이 하는 연료 넉넉하단 것이겠다 홍동지가 그러하다 전기장판 랭장고들 컴퓨터에 텔레비전 라디오와 줄 전화에 전기밥솥 보일러에 조리기에 밥 찬거리

아이들과 함께 탈북자 강철우(35. 가명) 씨는 “한여름에 서울거리를 중학생 아들과 같이 걷다가 남한녀성들 로출 심한 옷차림에 민망해 눈을 어디에 둬야 할지 당황했다. 거리 전체가 미성년자 관람불가 같았다”면서 “북한에서 아무리 개방스러운 사람이라도 남한녀성들 같은 옷차림으로 거리를 다닌다는 건 상상도 하지 못한다”

http://www.newfocus.co.kr/

아마도 그게 환경부담금이라고 할 것이다 그것을 낸다고 아무렇지도 않다는 말인가 왜 길거리를 갈 때마다 특히 새벽에 맑은 공기를 더럽혀서 이 몸도 더럽히는가 말이다 산책일랑 그래서 자동차 매연을 피해서 다니게 하는가 말이다 온 세상 모든 자동차 매연을 고발한다

그네들, 왜 거의 하나같이 짧은 치마들을 입고 나서는 것인지 좀 낮추 보이게 옷들을 입는다 남성에게 도전하는 것같이도 보인다 왜 그러는가 하고 생각해 보니까 좀 잘 팔리고 싶어서라고 써진다 나한테만 그렇게 보이는가는 모르나 나한테는 그것이 최소한 경범죄에는 속한다고 보인다 길 가다가 주위에서 가래침을 탁 뱉는 사람들과 같이 불쾌감을 선사한다는 말이다 이러면 녀성들은 이럴 것이다 그것이 무어 어때서 그러느냐 하고 말이다 그러나 아니올시다이다 남성은 이 글에서도 보이지만 이 `보인다'는 낱말대로 잘 보는 동물이기 때문이다 반면에 녀성은 잘 듣는 동물이기 때문이다 그렇게 옷 입은 녀성들은 그런 사정을 잘 알기 때문에 그렇게 입는 것 아닌가도 생각된다

가슴까지 아주 드러나게 강조를 하고 나서는 녀성 기상 방송인들을 이 블로거, 모든 블로거들한테 고발한다

"부자 되세요"
"오천 원 되세요"

사람 위주가 아니라 돈 위주여서 세상은 자본(과 국가와 종교가)이 꽉 잡고 있다 
한마디로, 사람이 만든 것이 사람을 부려먹고 계시다

까마귀 수천 마리 들판을 갸르르르 지나는 자전거는 경칩 때

위험한 데로 가라 거기가 탄탄대로!


(막상 가보면 시원한 데란 걸 알게 된다. 모든 건 소문이다 부닥치면 쉽다는 것을 안다. 아까는 자전거로 위험한 다리를 건넜는데 위험하기는커녕 안전하다 못해 아무도 없이 나만을 위한 다리였다. 사람들 시각과 시간 때문에 무어든 항상 과거나 미래다. 자전거 같은 탈것을 타면 시간이 빨리 지난다.)

둘 다 `연장'이 주제더군. 앞엣것은 칼 같은 연장을, 뒤엣것은 생식기라는 연장을. 그 연장질을 영화화한 것이며 그 이상은 없더군.

이러나 저러나 시간은 가는군 이 또한 지나가 봄날에

비가 오고 혹 꾸물꾸물 우울하게 하는데 요새는 어쩌자고 맨날 막걸리나 맥주냐 그래, 하기는 그래 휴대전화 없지 차 없지 아내 없지 자식 없지 돈 버는 직장 없지 있다면 상속재산 논이 수용 당해서 평생 하루 막걸리 한 병쯤은 먹어도 되는 처지로서 꼬부랑꼬부랑 허리는 수술했고 그래서 재발이 걱정되는 척추 압박이 있고 그래서 앉아 있음이 도가 지나칠 때면 푹 누워 있어야 하는 일, 티브이 `디스커버리' 채널을 대리만족으로 특히 삼는다

엊그제 그 적바림 묵은 것들을 하나하나 일삼아 읽고 버리다가 건진 것 몇 안 되지만 있다

국가라고 하는 것은 폭력을 독점한 단체일 뿐이며 불법 부당하다는 견해. 곧, `괴뢰 홍동지(= 나)'는 아나키스트쯤 된다 함이다 - 구승회. 에코필로소피. 새길출판사.

그러고 보니까 내게는 알콜이 무기weapon인가 보다, 이렇게, 새로움은 술에서 나온다 하긴 고대 그리스 생각꾼들도 향연이며 주연이며 술을 마시면서 국가며 우주를 론하였지

니체는 또 그랬다지 모든 것은 거짓이다, 모든 것은 허용되어 있다

미국인들은 좋겠다 그래도 총기를 자유 소지할 수 있어서 정 안되면 개인 반란을 할 수 있어서

어제 점친 것은 결국 맞게 되긴 했다 이사갈 료량으로 수십 년 묵은 적바림들을 버렸다 점이란 것은 그렇게 자가발전식으로 꿰어 맞추기임

루트비히 포이어바흐 말씀.

かき-つけ [書(き)付(け)]   1. [명사] 문서. 증서.
2. [명사] 청구서.


오늘 무슨 종이글이 날아들겠구나. 아니면 말고.

내가 이 세상에서 가장 무서워하는 것은 휴대전화와 음주 다음날 숙취 때 오는 죄의식이다 앞엣것은 현실로 다가오며 뒤엣것은 심리로 온다 앞엣것은 흔히 경찰순찰차로 바로 오며 뒤엣것은 우주의식이며 절멸감이며 죽음 의식으로 불쑥불쑥 온다 둘 다 술과 관련된 것이다 고로 술과만 관계치 않을 때는 태평하다고 할 수 있다